God And Doubts Essay Example For Students

God And Doubts Essay Mommy, Ive killed God. You wanted a scar; there it is, plain as day(no two-level, deep meanings attached). My scar isnt external, nor, do Isuppose, is it internal. Heck, I dont know what it is but all my life I knowits been my scar, my burden. I have a problem with Christianity. But I dontshow disrespect to those who choose to follow it (unless they try to imposetheir beliefs on me), and I dont force my thoughts on anyone (you are choosingto read this). You want sex, intoxication, violence, incest and death? Read theBible! Though, on second thought, maybe you should stick to Lost Souls byPoppy Z. Brite, its much better. I killed God when I was still little; no onemade me. Or maybe they did! Maybe the couple hours a week of religious educationfor ten years did, maybe it was the bible passages they told a room full ofsix-year-olds, because no matter how pretty the stories they told us were, Ialways knew they were just easy answers. Gods love is boundless, God forgivesall, and it doesnt matter if you dont love Jesus, because Jesus loves you. Isnt that nice? But wait a minute, then sin comes into it. If you sin, eventhough Gods love is infinite and he will forgive all, sorry sucker, youregoing to hell. Unbelievable? Here, let me explain. You may think Now thatsokay, God forgives me; Im going to heaven. Yeah right! Youre blocking thehitch thats always associated with something thats too good to be true; theBible says that all men are sinners. So whats a girl to do? It seems youregoing to be going to hell anyway. And who is going to end up in heaven if theserules kick in? Id much rather live in hell with my friends, thank you verymuch. It sounds like youd get some pretty weird little guys in heaven. I thinkIll leave them to it. On the flip side, we dont need to worry about going tohell; were all going to heaven! Yeah! Because of Jesus, who by the way was bothGod and Gods only son (and this guy invented mankind? He mustve been prettystoned the day Jesus appeared on the scene). Anyway, guess what? Jesus died forour sins! So n ow we can sin as much as we like and it doesnt matter. Now wasntthat just kind of him? And then you realize that since youre supposed to followeverything in the bible, you have to live both sides at the same time,complicated, huh? Im not even sure I want to go to heaven, because if the bibleis true then God just doesnt seem like a very nice guy. I doubt hed like metoo much. I read the Book of Job and the big man in the sky doesnt exactly comeoff looking too good in this one. It all starts one fine day when the Devil(lovely chap) starts pestering God to prove how faithful one of his followersis. God caves to Devils mind tricks and picks out a random guy who has alwaysbeen a well-behaved Christian. And so, God kills his family, ruins his crops,and plagues him with all sorts of diseases. How nice of God whose, mind you,love is boundless and infinite and you should follow his example. I dont knowabout you but Id rather not. Incase you hadnt noticed Im not your idealcandidate for entry i nto the kingdom heaven. Lets see: Ive had a drink,probably will have sex, taken drugs, swear occasionally, I dont love my enemies(or even my neighbors, for that matter), hate is one of my most frequently usedemotions, and I dont believe in God (now thats a major one!). But thats notthe worst of it because I happen to believe that love transcends gender. Goddoesnt like this, if youre gay, youre not going to heaven. So children repeatafter me; God is a homophobe. Ive not even scratched the surface yet, butsurely you can already see why Ive killed God. Maybe youve begun to understanda modicum of the torment I feel. The blasted torment that I have to carry as ascar on myself for the rest of my life.